Monday, November 30, 2009

Shaun Michelle Kennedy

Blackened skin circles her brown eyes and blood runs from her ears. Long curls of deep brown hair fall across her shirt that reads “Public Option” and the blood-covered surgical mask over her mouth says “H1N1 Prevention.” A giant deli-style ticket in her slender hand says “Welcome to American Health Care” and lists her as the 48,980,000th uninsured American. Her name is Shaun Michelle Kennedy and she is not dying. But her Halloween costume this year symbolizes the enormous disparity in American health care coverage and the continued lack of government support for universal health care.

“I don’t care if you’re fucking royalty. We’re all human beings, that’s the way it is,” Kennedy says, sitting next to her partner, Saranique Nicole Schwartz, in the living room of their home in Oakland’s Fruitvale neighborhood.

Kennedy, Schwartz and Kennedy’s husband of eight years, David E. Martinez, live in a polyamorous relationship. Their three-person partnership resembles a traditional marriage in every sense except one: it is not legally recognized. Kennedy, Schwartz and Martinez, an independent validation consultant for pharmaceutical and medical device implant companies, currently working in New Delhi, India, have cohabitated since 2006.

Born in Santa Monica, Calif. in 1978, driving away from her birthplace at 18 months old is Kennedy's earliest vivid memory. Her family relocated to Hollywood Riviera, a beachfront neighborhood in Torrance, where Kennedy lived until she enrolled at University of California, Berkeley to study history in 1996. That’s where she met Martinez.

“Toward the middle-end of our freshman year, Shaun and I became inseparable.” Martinez says, “To this day, I feel very fortunate to have such a strong and wonderful woman as my partner.”

An El Salvador native, Martinez met Kennedy during the first few days of their freshman year. Long hours of studying, hanging out in their dormitory and participating in the many freshman icebreaker activities drew the pair closer and closer. Overlooking the Pacific Ocean and Catalina Island, Kennedy and Martinez exchanged vows in July 2001 in Palos Verdes, Calif.

“Not that I’m biased,” Kennedy jokes, “but it was the most beautiful wedding I’ve ever been to.”

Celebrating their unique and incredible love was just one of the many reasons the pair decided to wed; Kennedy also knew that marrying Martinez would allow him to remain in the states even though he is not an American citizen. However, the institution of marriage leaves a bad taste in her mouth because legally, the love shared between Kennedy and her two partners isn’t recognized. American law only acknowledges the union between Kennedy and Martinez, but in their eyes, Schwartz exists as an equal in their relationship.

“If David and I could make it legal and give Saranique more rights, we would,” Kennedy says, her hands rigid in front of her face, “but we can’t.”

“Saranique has been a wonderful addition to our lives,” Martinez says. “The three of us have shared so much, and once again, I have to say I extremely feel fortunate to have met a person like Shaun who is not only comfortable with herself, but at the same time very secure of our relationship.”

Kennedy and Martinez have to re-write their living wills to give Schwartz control in the event of an emergency and they don’t receive benefits, such as tax breaks, that other legally recognized partners do. Even though marriage is a bittersweet concept, Kennedy doesn’t denounce the ceremonial aspect to it.

“A big party to celebrate love? Everyone should do that,” Kennedy says, “And we should do it more often.”

At UC Berkeley, Kennedy immersed herself in learning and earned two Bachelor’s degrees in four years. Always a lover of studying the past, Kennedy earned one degree in History. She obtained her second degree, in Women’s Studies, for other reasons.

“I took it because I could not stand anymore white penises for a while,” Kennedy says of the mostly male professors she had before enrolling in Women’s Studies courses, “I wanted some tits and ass, please!”

After graduating from UC Berkeley, Kennedy got her teaching credential from California State University, Hayward. She immediately began teaching at Albany Ocean View Elementary school, running an after school program at Albany Kid’s Corner and organizing social nights for local teens. At 27, overwhelmed by 100-hour work weeks and the tightening restrictions of a publicly funded school district, Kennedy sought more positive surroundings.

“I’m a fighter,” Kennedy says, “I already have cynical tendencies, I don’t need anything to make me more like that.”

Kennedy found the positive change she needed doing canine training, rehabilitation and general care. In 2006, while working at Every Dog has its Day Care, a specialized canine day care facility in Emeryville, she met and fell in love with Schwartz. Charlie Bennett, a former Every Dog employee and a close friend to the three partners, first interacted with Kennedy during a Christmas gift exchange at work.

“She didn’t draw me out of the hat for ‘Secret Santa,’ but she made me a gift anyway,” Bennett recalls as she pantomimes the shape of a star and smiles widely, “She wrote me a cute note about my improvement at work and made me a wire star Christmas ornament, I still have it.”

A fluffy pink, purple and green tutu hangs from a nail in a doorway of the home Kennedy shares with her partners. To the right of the front door, dog leashes of every length, color and material hang from a different nail, waiting for the next walk. Besides the three human inhabitants, on any given day 14 dogs click-clack across the wooden floors of the two-bedroom, one-bathroom house. Zeus, Jacob, Kahlo and Rex are permanent residents; the other dogs belong to clients of Walk On Pup, a full-service dog care company Kennedy and Schwartz established January 1.

For almost a year, Kennedy and Schwartz have walked their growing pack 12 miles per day, five to seven days per week. Beyond exercise, Walk On Pup trains, grooms, boards overnight and shuttles to veterinary appointments. In the future, Kennedy hopes to return to early childhood education, but her dream would be to provide canine therapy to kids.

While Kennedy and her partners have no immediate plans for children, she concedes that maybe one day she and Schwartz could both be mommies. She says the three of them have discussed harvesting Kennedy’s eggs so Schwartz could carry their future children. But, like most discussions of future plans, their relationship’s complicated legal status becomes the ultimate focus and unfortunate roadblock to decision-making.

“We’re Puritanical bastards in this country,” Kennedy says. “Personal life restrictions is what we legislate.”

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

No, I don't want fries with that.

On Dec. 31, 2008, my boyfriend and I made a New Year's Resolution to stop eating fast food. By January 3, we found ourselves waking suddenly in the middle of night, staring blankly at each other while visions of Whoppers danced in our subconscious.

"Is it going to be this hard? Should we give up?" We asked.

In the 11th month of our plan, I am a thinner, less-sluggish version of my former self. How? Well, I found a way to satisfy my appetite by making homemade, healthy meals. California Department of Education Nutrition Consultant Heather Reed’s advice and the following tips may help avoid fast food by substituting homemade meals.

Put down your car keys and march into your kitchen.

If your idea of dinner routinely involves counting exact change at the drive-thru window, you owe your kitchen and your body an apology.
“People have gone away from preparing their own food.” Reed says, “It might seem overwhelming, but it’s really not that hard.”
You don’t have to get out of your car to buy Burger King’s Triple Whopper. But if you know that burger has 1,230 calories and 738 of those are from fat, you might rejoice in the opportunity to burn calories by walking to the register and back to your parking spot.
A better alternative could be to create a juicy cheeseburger at home using 93 percent lean ground turkey, which will end up at 300 calories, cooked. Most grocers sell inexpensive pre-formed turkey burger patties that, when grilled in garlic powder and dried basil, topped with onion, fresh spinach and your favorite low-fat cheese, has all the flavor and none of the junk found in fast food burgers.

Don’t let your stomach hijack your mind.

If you think that nothing satisfies your hunger like greasy fast food, be aware that hunger is a fickle, twisted, sometimes evil monster. The hungrier I am, the more I become convinced that nothing will satisfy my hunger like a gooey bacon cheeseburger or nothing will taste as good as crispy, ketchup-drenched French fries. In reality, your stomach feels full whether you eat the same amount of lean grilled chicken in a lettuce wrap or a mayonnaise-drenched chicken sandwich on a spongy bun.
To make mouth-watering lettuce wraps as an alternative to a fried chicken sandwich, start with your favorite fresh vegetables. Chopped cucumber, carrot, broccoli and onion provide strong flavors when filled inside a chilled lettuce cup. Drizzle reduced fat Asian sesame or peanut dressing plus a hot sauce, like Tabasco, on top of lean, grilled chicken to complete a spicy, fresh flavor combination.
If you want a side, like French fries, with your faux fast food meal, try thinly slicing a large potato and baking the pieces in a fine layer of olive oil and parmesan cheese. Reed asserts that baked food is always healthier than anything fried, but she says that taking control of your body’s wellness requires a strong commitment.
“The best tool is to monitor what you’re eating. Preparing food yourself is even better,” Reed says.


The numbers don’t lie but they do add up-quickly.

Be realistic about your daily caloric intake. That 1,230-calorie Triple Whopper mentioned above is just a part of the fast food combination meal equation. Throw in French fries and you can easily add another 360 calories to your belt. Round out your meal, and your belly, with a large Coca-Cola soft drink and you are adding another 390 calories. The total for this meal at Burger King is 1,980 calories, only twenty calories short of the average daily recommended caloric intake for an adult person. That’s a daily intake of 2,000 calories.


Will I indulge in fast food in 2010? I plan to avoid it as long as I can craft simple, delicious meals at home. However, in the late nights of the new year, if my mind is too weak to ward off those Whopper-shaped temptations, rules could be broken.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

The middle finger

Whatever happened to the middle finger?

I feel like people don't use this digit in vulgar gestures as much as we used to.

My first encounter with "the finger" occurred when I was about 6 years old, sitting on my grandmother's lap on a Greyhound bus in San Francisco. I was sucking my thumb and, like most kids my age, found one of my fingers drawn to my nostril. Yes, I was a nose picker. I remember digging for gold and peering out of one of the bus's large windows. My eyes caught the eyes of a homeless man on the street. For reasons still unknown to me (perhaps it was the placement of one of my fingers in my nose? perhaps he felt animosty toward children?), this homeless man gave me a rather aggressive middle finger. I gazed at him, not knowing the exact meaning behind this man thrusting his finger up at me, but I did have a sense that it wasn't a happy hand signal, like a friendly wave, for example. To my surprise and without any hesitation, my then 70-something grandmother gave him the finger right back! Maybe she thought his vulgarity was directed toward her or maybe she felt that he deserved some distasteful feelings thrust back his way for flipping off a child. I'll never know but the memory still has a hold on me.

It's not exactly the middle finger that has the power to offend. It's the meaning and emotion behind the act of "giving" someone the finger.

How did a simple hand gesture turn into something so negative?

What is the psychology behind the middle finger?

And more importantly, has the use of the finger changed in recent years?

My curiosity is growing....


Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Ideas

I'm sitting here in my air-conditioned office trying to think of ideas for different kinds of magazine articles....
And what keeps repeating in my mind is the phrase "write what you know." So let's start there!

For my "how to" article:
I know how to:
-train dogs
-plant & grow a garden
-network (facebook etc)
-avoid fast food for a whole year (I'm into the 9th month!)



More to come...